The Importance of Play

This school year is almost over for my kids! It's crazy how fast it's flown by. Anyone else feeling like this year only lasted a couple months?

The summer months are just around the corner, and I've been reflecting on something I learned several years ago from Brené Brown---speaker, podcaster, and research professor at the University of Houston:

"The opposite of play is NOT work. The opposite of play is DEPRESSION."

She defines PLAY as time spent without a specific purpose; where you lose track of time and self-consciousness; and which ultimately fosters empathy, creativity, and innovation.

What is considered play varies from person to person. Some people love to do puzzles, read, or play basketball. Others like to swim with their family, cook without a recipe, or go on a long canyon drive.

Brown referenced several research studies about play, showing that it is essential for mental and physical well-being.

While some adults judge play to be childish, a lack of play is found to result in increased levels of depression and aggression. And some studies have even shown a DIRECT correlation between violence and lack of play.

In Brown's workshop, The Power of Vulnerability, she shared this sobering true story: "In 1966, Charles Whitman, a student at the University of Texas, opened fire on students from the top of UT Tower. Following the attack, psychiatrist Stuart Brown studied Whitman’s history for clues to what led him to carry out such a horrific act." He discovered that Whitman’s father never allowed him to play and demanded perfection, a fact that Brown believes led to the repressed rage that led to the attacks.

So, why does this matter?

First of all, we need to give our kids and teens lots of opportunities to play. And remember that extracurricular activities don't count as play because they have too much structure and purpose. Play also doesn't typically involve an electronic device, as these tend to stifle empathy, creativity, and innovation.

Our kids need to PLAY. Our families need to play with each other. As parents, we need to let our hair down and PLAY with our kids, for their mental and emotional health and ours.

The forms of play that yield the greatest health benefits are those that CONNECT us with other people in light-hearted ways.

Play fosters this connection, but it also allows us to explore and learn new things which helps us develop cognitive skills such as problem-solving, creativity, spatial awareness, and imagination.

As parents, we need to be mindful to NOT overschedule our kids, our teens, and even ourselves. Play is an essential part of a healthy lifestyle.

This week, I encourage you to make a list of things that you enjoy doing that could be classified as play. Then ask each member of your family this same question. It's fun to see which activities everyone in the family loves that you can all do together.

For my family, several of us like to hit the volleyball around, others love playing board games, and several love doing nails. If you're feeling extra ambitious, make a family Venn diagram showing which activities mutually fall in the PLAY category for different family members. Email me back with your discoveries.

Make play a priority in your family. It might just transform your summer.